TheAgaliWorld, article

And I’m very proud of it.

As driver of the couple, and groomsman of the husband, it was necessary to mark the occasion.

You have to know that I am one of the oldest friends of the couple (Nana and Soulé, we made Niger together), but also one of the most unlucky people...

In their presence, I had malaria (by being the one of the group who protected most) followed by salmonellas (by finishing a plate which was not mine), I locked keys into my car (with engine on, normally impossible) and made a tendonitis the day before making cannoning in Spain!!!

As they had attended all these events, I never understand why they ask me to drive them, especially in the DS of my grandfather.
The Symbol was beautiful; this car married my parents, my sister, my cousins, other strangers....

But this car has a (long) story: since 1969, it knew (besides bodywork) a broken engine, a fire and diverse more or less original failures....

Knowing this (and warned by my father that beyond 90kmh, I risked to totally ruin the engine), I did not discourage myself, and begins to recondition the beauty.

Reconditioning which ends in the morning of the wedding, at about 11AM, at the parents of the groom and under a pouring rain.


Rainy wedding, happy wedding, apparently (in any cases we heard this approximately 256,5 times), and it is true that everything was fine before we go to the wedding diner.

Then, it is the drama: I return the car in front of the room to take the bridegrooms, but the engine stops.
And in front of the delirious crowd… impossible to restart (shame on me).
After half a dozen (in fact 6) attempts, we decide to push the car to try start his f*** engine.

So inhabitants of the small village where we were could admire a fabulous procession of 2 half dozen (in fact 12) guys in suit pushing a car containing a bride, a groom and an ashamed driver.

Naturally, this crap car (well, yes, just like that it lost its charm) does not start.
We park it, and then I make a phone call to the technical support (my father).

Finally, and I really don’t know why, I re-try later: IT STARTS (don’t ask me why).
While we leave, the bride (herself) phones to cancel the technical intervention.


It is only 40km farther that I decide that only one failure was not enough.

Stoplight: the engine stops again.

No panic, I press on the button of starting up.
In fact, panic, that makes as when the battery is empty (nevertheless it seemed to me that it was on the other DS than the alternator was dead).

I let you imagine the insults in the car, the horns, the bride bursting out laughing, the much less joyful groom…
But after some minutes, THIS F*** CAR STARTS AGAIN (I understand less and less).


Finally, we arrive at the reception room without any other problems.

And I am ashamed only when a guy shows me its white pants.
The poor man was behind the exhaust when I restarted the first time!!!


Anyway, the couple stills speak to me, and I am very proud to have made the failure trick to the bride (even if the groom was in the car).


PS, I didn’t find any translation for “le coup de la panne” in English.
The failure trick (as I call it), is to pretend that his car breaks down to be alone with somebody in a more or less desert place, in order to make advances to her (the bride in this case).
But apparently there is no translation. English people are too gentleman to use such a trick (hum !)


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